The trouble with Mary and Martha

It was a pleasure to be on Morning Air this morning, and I’ll share the audio when it’s up. Until then, I want to talk about the story of Mary and Martha, which I included in my article, Recognizing Jesus, and which, of all things, is generating the most comments online. Plus, it’s timely, since it is the story in today’s Gospel reading.

These are the comments on my article:

“Perhaps Mary did not decide to shrug off her duty, but rather was so drawn to the Lord that she simply forgot earthly things.”

“In ending, try that while driving a car.”

“The one obvious hypothetical here is that if Martha also decided to sit and listen there might have been no one to host the guests per custom, resulting in a serious breach of etiquette.”

“Martha’s only error was complaining. Those of us who find ourselves in Martha’s position can take comfort in the fact that not all necessary jobs are of equal value. Mary chose the better part, but someone also has to take the lesser jobs of cooking and cleaning, which are necessary components of hospitality. Even the choirs of angels are not all equal. Yet who would say that the guardian angels are not valuable because they are not seraphim?”

“It was my understanding and is possible that Martha and Mary were EQUALLY responsible for their guests and Mary decided to shrug off hers for the ‘better part’ in which case the complaint was valid though lacking in forbearance, eliciting Jesus’ conciliatory response.”

Here is why I think this hit a nerve. And, by the way, this is consistently one of the most challenging and misunderstood stories in the Bible. In retrospect, I wouldn’t have included it in my article because it is drawing people away from the larger point about why we don’t recognize Jesus, and how to recognize Jesus.

I think it hits a nerve that causes people to be defensive because it is so much easier - especially for women - to identify with Martha over Mary. Martha is, by all accounts, doing the right thing - she is taking care of her guests. Women like to cook, clean, organize, and invite, and yet Jesus states that her sister, Mary, who is doing none of these things - and indeed burdening Martha by apparently shirking her duties - has chosen “the better part.” So people get defensive and want to stand up for Martha, because chances are, they themselves would be doing the exact same thing in her situation.

But that’s my whole point, and why I included it in the story: this situation is different. They are not just entertaining anybody, they are entertaining the Son of God. And Mary recognizes that.

I have written and spoken many times about the role of the laity, and finding God in daily life. So, yes, that of course still applies. And I do find Martha, rushing about with the chores, more relatable in this instance.

What we are called to do, though, is think less about what Martha is doing and more about what Mary is doing. It’s always framed as a negative - she was not helping her sister, she was not doing what would have been most helpful in hosting their guests. But she was doing something - she was actively attending to Jesus by sitting with him - being with him - listening, and essentially following him in that moment. It is similar to our experience of being with God in prayer, now.

In this instance - as opposed to when you have your in-laws or neighbors or friends over - they were entertaining God himself, and Mary recognized that. That was my point in including it in the article. See it as such! Let go of the need to defend Martha and look at what Mary is, indeed, doing.

We need both Marthas and Marys, and we need to be both Martha and Mary. But there is a time and a place. Who knows, perhaps Jesus would have multiplied loaves or changed water into wine in order to allow Martha, too, to sit at his feet, and not work and worry. There, we have yet another opportunity to reflect on faith, and trust that God will provide.

So those are some additional thoughts for you. This reading will continue to challenge Christians through the ages, no doubt. But think about it in terms of the specific situation: and what it means to recognize, and therefore be, with Jesus.

And lastly: wishing you a blessed Feast of St. Francis! May all your dogs and cats and iguanas be blessed.

On recognizing Jesus

Dear friends, my latest article is up at Catholic Stand, called Recognizing Jesus. I began thinking about this topic at Easter, when the reading about Mary Magdalene at Jesus’s tomb was read. One time, when I was doing the spiritual exercises (the “19th annotation”), this was a passage for meditation and I remember feeling so deeply the sadness and grief expressed in this reading, and it stayed with me, and returns every time I read it. I mean, my goodness, Jesus himself is standing right in front of her and Mary Magdalene thinks he’s…the gardener? It’s almost silly. So I thought, why did this happen? And similarly, the disciples on the road to Emmaus, why couldn’t they tell who Jesus was, as he literally walked and talked with them, interpreting the scriptures about himself?

So, it is an intriguing idea. Here is my conclusion: in both the case of Mary Magdalene and the disciples walking with Jesus on the road to Emmaus, they were both caught up in a.) their own grief, despair and preoccupations, and b.) how they thought Jesus should appear. Both are equally important to consider.

Recall that the disciples on the road to Emmaus though that Jesus, as the king, would appear as other kings they knew - in earthly power, perhaps even violence, concerned with a material kingdom. They say,

“But we were hoping that he would be the one to redeem Israel.”

To which we, as modern readers, think, “He did! Didn’t you realize it?” Perhaps they thought God would physically restore the temple. Either way, they were looking for a certain type of God that looked like what they expected him to.

Apply this to your own life: when God seems far away - when you do not recognize him - is one stumbling block your own expectation of what he will look like?

“Their eyes were prevented from seeing him,” it says in Luke. As for Mary, she even sees two angels before Jesus himself appears. We are given no indication that she recognizes them, either. There is nothing that states how or why she does not recognize Jesus, but we later learn she clung to Jesus when she did realize:

“Jesus said to her, ‘Stop holding on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father.’”

We know, at least, that she was utterly grief stricken and we can imagine the effect her tears had on her vision. That is the literal interpretation. But I take it further, that her emotional distress - even, her lack of faith - prevented her from seeing Jesus.

Has this happened to you, where your preoccupation and worry clouded your ability to see Jesus in your life?

Lastly, I conclude the article with some thoughts on where, when, and how to “see” Jesus now. Of course we do not sit and dine with him (minus the Eucharist), or invite him to our house to chat. So, if Jesus as a human body is not really present here today, where do we find him? In others, of course. In our friends and family, in those we work with and serve, in those in need of our help. Corporal and spiritual acts of mercy are a great antidote to disbelief, sadness, and lack of faith.

Ii is possible there is some other interpretation here, or even an official church one, but this is the one that makes the most sense to me - because I have experienced it. When you are caught up in your own despair, you cannot recognize Jesus in your life and around you.

One more thing: I’ll be on the radio this coming Tuesday, 10/4 at 7:10 am eastern to discuss recognizing Jesus with John and Glenn on Morning Air. You can listen live here.

Praying you are having an excellent beginning to the fall season!

Latest radio appearance: how and why to pray for others

Hello! Last week I enjoyed being with John and the Morning Air team to discuss my article, For Whom Should I Pray? with an emphasis on - others! The world, and the church!

You can hear the playback here, starting around the 7:02 mark.

A few interesting things we discussed:

• Where and how do I begin to pray?

• Why do the Church and world need our prayers? (and not just ourselves?)

• Do my prayers really make a difference?

• Prayer is not about getting what we want - and we often will not see the answers to our prayers, especially if it’s for something happening on the other side of the world

• Fidelity to the prayer is as important as the prayer itself. So is trust!

• Mystical prayer is not about sensory experiences, but about complete trust in God

• YOU are called to pray for the Church in all its dimensions

• Priests need your prayers. They’re human, too!

• You never know how your prayers are going to impact someone in their life

• Prayer is not about what you are going to accomplish, but what God is going to accomplish through your prayers - nothing is impossible for God!

• God works outside of time - prayer for now, for the future, and even for the past

• Organize your prayer intentions in a way that makes sense for you, and include your family if you can

• By praying for others, we begin to see ourselves as part of something greater than ourselves

• End your prayer with gratitude - and always thank God ahead of time

Prayer, if you have not noticed, is one of my favorite subjects. I feel strongly that it is a part of everyone’s vocation. So, if you are not yet, take that step, and pray not just for your immediate needs today, but for the needs of the world and church around you. In that, you will begin to find your place in the body of Christ, and build even further your faith and trust in Him.